13 Months & Forever

I started this blog in October 2012, and it’s odd looking back over the past 13 months and seeing how my life has changed.

In a lot of ways, it hasn’t. I’m still living at home with my Pops (although this is about to change come next month), and I still find myself in a job that I would not consider anywhere near the ideal (although I have been given numerous leadership and growth opportunities which I would have never had at my previous job). Family is family. I’ve finally learned to accept things and let go. So that stressor has greatly diminished from the forefront of my consciousness. I’ve rekindled friendships from long ago, so I’m not lonely or sad in that regard. I did end up attending my 10-year high school reunion. It felt like high school again in the sense that everyone was separated into their old cliques, everyone was sizing up everyone else’s life and appearance, and I found myself still single and dateless. But I did have a good time. It felt really good to look around me at the beautiful, smiling faces I once knew and to reconnect. I’ve felt guilty for many years for losing touch with people who once cared about me, and it’s been a gift getting to see them and hang out with them again since the reunion. Lunch dates, girls’ nights, an ear to talk to—these things are commonplace for me once again. And one of the greatest eyeopeners, is really connecting with them and realizing that we’ve all learned that life isn’t what any of us thought it would be. Social media is so deceptive, and reconnecting physically has made my world real again.

In 2 weeks, I’ll be finishing up packing and then flying out to the Philippines for 18 days. They were just hit by one of the most powerful typhoons in recorded history, so that has crossed several things off of my list of sights to tour. Seeing the first few photos of the destruction and chaos since Haiyan passed through is absolutely depressing, but I’m so – so – so very thankful my family is safe. Filipinos are such strong and resilient people and they’ve been through so much repeatedly over the years. I can’t wait until my plane lands in Manila, and I’m greeted by a sea of wide grins set against their beautiful, sun-tanned skins. A smiling and lively culture even in the midst of trial.

There are many things I want to say, but time is always rushing forward and my thoughts just disappear into space. I’ve got a lot of work to do this weekend, which unfortunately takes precedence over the things I wanted to get done. And time is of the essence. I’m reaching out to forever.


Little, Bright Things